Title - Influence is not about charisma
Some pointers that I've got are:
1. Doing others a favour
2. Holding people to a standard
3. Providing exclusive information
On Doing others a favour
- Doing a favour to someone is giving the person an implied obligation. It is a universal rule that when you receive a favour from someone, you reciprocate.
- What is lesser known is the psychological truth is that when you return a favour, you increase your likeability.
- Over time, when favours are made and received in a continuous two way cycle between two people, the relationship gets strengthened. Soon, you will have a strong network of not just colleagues, but friends and partners.
On Holding people to a standard
- When people fall short of a certain benchmark or standard, we could potentially use the standard as a positive way to align people to the original standard they set for themselves. You could point out the positive reputation the person has built up previously when he/she was at his/her best, but fell short recently.
- What you are doing is applying the principle of commitment and consistency. Because of the high standard your co-worker set for himself previously (i.e. a commitment), he or she will feel motivated to attain that standard again this time.
On Providing exclusive information
- Exclusive information is deemed to be highly persuasive and influential because it is not available to anyone on the street. It is available only to the selected few.
- If a person is able to receive such information from you, they will be able to achieve two things. Firstly, it helps them do their work better. Secondly, it enables them to increase the possibility of a successful outcome because they are doing their job differently now that they know this is critical information. In fact, you are also doing them a favour, which directly increase the level of likeability both ways.
Yours,
Something Small Thinking Big
